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Commentary on a snippet of Faith for ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
mia6363. Aziraphale/Crowley heavy:
mia6363. Aziraphale/Crowley heavy:[Okay, first thing you have to understand, I have this ... thing ... with Crowley fixing people, and with Aziraphale being hurt, and I have this really, really, really big thing with trust, and the testing of trust, and proving that you are worthy of trust even if you really, really shouldn't be. And Aziraphale and Crowley ... they are such the perfect, perfect pair for that, because they should be enemies. They should want to ruin each other, and tear each other down, whether from 'evil' or 'justice', and they don't. They trust each other, when they really shouldn't, and care about each other, and are willing to stand beside each other and give out to all comers, and I adore that about them. *grins* I always have]
He stopped, paused. Bit his lip. The fear on his face, the tremble of remembered horror [Thing about Aziraphale is ... he cares. He cares about humanity, and wants what's best for them, and through some periods of history ... sometimes there's no more sure-fire way to be hurt than to let yourself care about people. To let yourself feel their pain. I can't imagine the Crusades as anything else, for him] ... it went away, faded almost completely, and something radiant filled his features. Something bright and wondering and soft. "Then Crowley came," he went on, so softly. "My very own demon." He laughed, a little, shaking his head, and smiled up at Dean. [... I have mentioned that the love between these two -whether as companions or partners or whatever you want to see it as- is really, really beautiful? *smiles* It's gorgeous]
"You wonder why I trust him, don't you?" the angel asked, grinning at Dean's expression. "I suppose I don't blame you. But you have to understand ... he could have done anything to me, back then. Anything at all. [Because Aziraphale would have let him, not out of trust but out of sheer despair, and that ... that is terrible. To give out of hate, or despair, it's ... *shakes head*] He was ordered to do something, to tempt me into a Fall, to help it destroy me, to kill me, if it seemed easier. He was ordered to. And he could have. When he found me, he could have done anything, everything. Whatever he pleased." [And terrifying, too. I have this other thing (I have a lot of things -_-;) with how being given power is an incredibly scary thing, how ... how being given power is almost to lose it, in some ways. Um. I have a thing with the negotiations of power in general, I think -_-;]
"But ... he didn't?" Dean asked, carefully, but really, the answer was kinda obvious. Aziraphale smiled at him.
"He didn't," he confirmed, happily. "Or rather, he did. He did tempt me. He put me to bed, and gave me rest while claiming he was tempting me to sloth. He fed me up, calling it gluttony. He told me terrible stories of what he'd done to people, trying to get a rise from me, trying to make me care again, and called it tempting me to wrath. He lied to me, challenged me, bullied me back onto my feet. He looked after me, and told his superiors that he was tempting me. And me ... he told me that he didn't want to have to endure someone else in my place, someone who wouldn't understand how things worked." He smiled. "He always was a terrible liar, even then ..."
[One of the things I love and adore about these two is how terribly sneaky they are. *grins at them* They've been rules-lawyering for millennia, and when it's on each other's behalf, when they do it to each other, just to justify that they're not the enemies they ought to be ... It's like they mix angel and demon in more ways than one. Tell a thousand lies to preserve one truth, deceive each other every damn day to preserve their trust ... This relationship is honestly one of the most ... the most fascinating, the most beautiful, the most adorable ... *spreads hands helplessly* I love the layers. Gods, I love the layers. They're like a kaleidoscope, or a fan of cards. The permutations ... *grins* They are gorgeous]
He stopped, paused. Bit his lip. The fear on his face, the tremble of remembered horror [Thing about Aziraphale is ... he cares. He cares about humanity, and wants what's best for them, and through some periods of history ... sometimes there's no more sure-fire way to be hurt than to let yourself care about people. To let yourself feel their pain. I can't imagine the Crusades as anything else, for him] ... it went away, faded almost completely, and something radiant filled his features. Something bright and wondering and soft. "Then Crowley came," he went on, so softly. "My very own demon." He laughed, a little, shaking his head, and smiled up at Dean. [... I have mentioned that the love between these two -whether as companions or partners or whatever you want to see it as- is really, really beautiful? *smiles* It's gorgeous]
"You wonder why I trust him, don't you?" the angel asked, grinning at Dean's expression. "I suppose I don't blame you. But you have to understand ... he could have done anything to me, back then. Anything at all. [Because Aziraphale would have let him, not out of trust but out of sheer despair, and that ... that is terrible. To give out of hate, or despair, it's ... *shakes head*] He was ordered to do something, to tempt me into a Fall, to help it destroy me, to kill me, if it seemed easier. He was ordered to. And he could have. When he found me, he could have done anything, everything. Whatever he pleased." [And terrifying, too. I have this other thing (I have a lot of things -_-;) with how being given power is an incredibly scary thing, how ... how being given power is almost to lose it, in some ways. Um. I have a thing with the negotiations of power in general, I think -_-;]
"But ... he didn't?" Dean asked, carefully, but really, the answer was kinda obvious. Aziraphale smiled at him.
"He didn't," he confirmed, happily. "Or rather, he did. He did tempt me. He put me to bed, and gave me rest while claiming he was tempting me to sloth. He fed me up, calling it gluttony. He told me terrible stories of what he'd done to people, trying to get a rise from me, trying to make me care again, and called it tempting me to wrath. He lied to me, challenged me, bullied me back onto my feet. He looked after me, and told his superiors that he was tempting me. And me ... he told me that he didn't want to have to endure someone else in my place, someone who wouldn't understand how things worked." He smiled. "He always was a terrible liar, even then ..."
[One of the things I love and adore about these two is how terribly sneaky they are. *grins at them* They've been rules-lawyering for millennia, and when it's on each other's behalf, when they do it to each other, just to justify that they're not the enemies they ought to be ... It's like they mix angel and demon in more ways than one. Tell a thousand lies to preserve one truth, deceive each other every damn day to preserve their trust ... This relationship is honestly one of the most ... the most fascinating, the most beautiful, the most adorable ... *spreads hands helplessly* I love the layers. Gods, I love the layers. They're like a kaleidoscope, or a fan of cards. The permutations ... *grins* They are gorgeous]
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